It sounds so easy . . . loving the children, but it isn't so easy for everyone, especially those whose childhoods were lived in fear and desperation. When a baby is loved and cared for it comes to know trust and acceptance. The "look of love" is an underestimated gift we pass on to our children. By that I mean, the love that pours forth from the eyes of a parent to his/her child. It is uncontrollable most of the time, but once in awhile we do consciously gaze into our child's eyes and communicate, with or without words, the deep and tender love we have for them.
I am a grandmother now, but sometimes when I close my eyes and think back, I can still remember the look in my parents' eyes when I felt such love. And just the other day, I realized something profound to me. I am blessed to have visits very often, sometimes daily quick pop-ins from one of my grown daughters or sons. It's easy to give a quick hug and kiss, which we mostly do, but the other day I was caught by love. I stood looking at my daughter, how hard she works, how loving and beautiful she is, what a gift she is to me . . . and I realized that I hadn't really held her in my arms and looked into her eyes . . . you know, deeply, and remind her how much she is loved. Yes, we hang up the phone saying "love you", write sentimental birthday cards expressing our love, but this day was different. I took her by surprise, and the surprise was that she responded just as she did when she was little. We rocked for a few long moments in each others arms and tears washed our faces. We both were needing to stop and be really present. These moments happen with each of my grown children, not every day or week or even month . . . but they happen and we are blessed.
So I encourage you to take the step if you haven't already. Give that "look of love" to your child, no matter what his/her age . . . because you know it well . . . time waits for no one and tomorrow may never come.
